Yeah. I got manic over the weekend. It was stay busy or go crazy. Turns out that I was able to stay busy and go crazy at the same time. Geez. Friday night after a couple of beers I got the urge to rearrange my messy office. So, a couple of hours later that task was done. My desk now faces the door instead of the wall. It’s gonna work out better that way.
Saturday I decided to see what shape the hardwood floors are in. The house has hardwood floors in the original part of the house but they have all been covered over by carpeting, tile and laminate flooring. Ugh. The small section I took up in the office looked pretty good. So, over the afternoon I was able to pull up about 2/3 of the carpet in that room. Saturday night I went to a cookout and it just ended up being two married couples and myself. I don’t know … it got me down being the single gay guy in amongst “straight and coupled.” That night I had a dream about “Evil” … and, no it wasn’t one of “those” kinda dreams. I have never had a dream involving sex with the “Evil” one. I have only had two. In the first we were walking with a mutual friend. When the friend wasn’t looking, “Evil” leaned in and whispered in my ear about how much he loved me. He told me that he had always felt that way and was finally ready for me to know it. In this one he had come back to visit and had a bunch of his Florida friends with him. He had lost weight and was looking better than ever. It was very clear that he had moved on and I was still stuck. That’s when I woke up at 5 a.m. and couldn’t get back to sleep.
Sunday I spent all day in a funk … alternately pulling up carpet and sitting in the floor wanting to cry. Stupid, stupid, stupid. Wanting to cry got nothing accomplished, but I did get all the carpeting out of that room and got furniture and such moved back into place … and at some point later I will have to take it all back apart and actually refinish the floor. That night I lay in the bed hugging my Bart Simpson Talking Doll thinking dark thoughts. But, no more dreams.
So, silence from me on Monday here. Work this week has been full of stress. More stress than there needs to be. New equipment. God, I hate learning to use new equipment. Especially when the boss expects you just to be able to make it work on the first try. As much as I want to think so, I aint that good.