In truth, I don’t feel like I am a really nice person. You know, deep down inside on that primal level. I don’t feel like I am all that talented at work or in the various activities that I am a part of. I feel like I waste a lot of time doing things for people that wouldn’t do the same if the positions were reversed. I have a “happy face” on most of the time. It gets very tiring. I want someone to share my life with. But, I feel that even if I were in a relationship I would have nothing to offer but obsessive, stalker-esque behavior. Various events in my life make me think that I really don’t deserve happiness. Therefore, I feel nobody else deserves it either. I feel very irrational most of the time. This is just a momentary lapse … a fault line on the surface that people see. It will disappear. Things will return to normal.