I am looking forward to seeing “Slither” (featuring Nathan Fillion!).

The reviews for the remake of “The Hills Have Eyes” seem to be off base for the most part. Alexandre Aja (Writer/Director of “Haute Tension”) delivers the goods and then some. It’s a very solid thrill ride with plenty of cheap thrills and buckets of blood and gore.

I have found it interesting that some reviewers who praised “Hostel” as being hardcore have lambasted “The Hills Have Eyes.” Trust me … “Hills” is the movie that “Hostel” promised us and never delivered.

Aja showed lots of promise with “Haute Tension.” That film was basically an exercise in using gore to help ratchet up the overall dread of the film. “The Hills Have Eyes” gives Aja a good chance to do something with a little more character and lot more with the gore. I found the violence in “Hills” to be a lot more vicious than that of “Haute Tension.” It makes me wonder if the MPAA harder on “Haute Tension” because it’s a foreign film and has let “Hills” slide a little more because it’s American.

I did like that the remake makes more sense of some of the plot points that never really worked in the Wes Craven version. The car wreck that strands the Carters in no-man’s land isn’t totally silly like before. Plus it’s nice to see the gas station owner be more active in getting the story rolling. The fact that our inbred, mutant cannibals are the by products of nuclear testing is a wee dull and standard … but it give us a great final act in a nuclear test site full of buildings and creepy 50’s style mannequins. That was fun! Some of the reviews have cried “foul” and have tried to make the argument that the filmmakers have a “message” about the effects of nuclear testing. Ummm, no. Aja isn’t on a soap box. He’s just using the nuclear issue as a basis not as a rallying cry. Those cannibals are evil and have no qualms about killing your mother and then pulling out her entrails for a light snack.

There are a few problems. There’s a pretty major scene that should have been in the film but is only referenced after the fact. I can only imagine that it ended up on the cutting room floor for some reason. Missing from the film also a family structure for our killers. To me that seems pretty important as the film’s thrust is Carter Family verses Cannibal Family. It works to set up the killers better as they aren’t all so random like so many other horror films treat the villains. Plus, it helps make Ruby’s act of defiance in the final act all the more plausible.

The acting is good all the way ’round. It real shame though that Emile de Ravin (of “Lost” fame) has nothing better to do than act totally hysterical after the first attack. Her character never really gets a chance to redeem herself past a cheap shot at the very end of the film.

So, hell yeah! There’s messy gunshot wounds, pick axes to the head, munched on entrails, eviscerated dogs, gnawed off arms, burned bodies and a baby that could potentially be lunch! “The Hills Have Eyes” was pretty rockin’ in my opinion.~

Yes, it’s mindless. Yes, the story is very from the cookie cutter with some plot holes and major silliness. But what I can respect about a film like “Final Destination 3” is that it does what it promises. It kills off C-List teen actors in elaborate and satisfyingly gory ways.

The Story:
You should know it. Girl foresees a roller coaster accident and gets her friends off the ride. Of course, the coaster crashes meaning that the “survivors” have cheated Death. Well, he gets super pissed about being cheated and comes back to kill with a vengeance.

Yeah. If you saw the first and second film you know the drill. “FD3” strictly follows the formula set down by it predecessors. The roller coaster sequence is a highlight. Don’t know why, but I have always had a thing for amusement park ride induced mayhem. Each subsequent death scene get more elaborate (think Rube Goldberg) and messy. There seemed to be a lot of head trauma in this movie … from car motors to weight machines to nail guns. Yup. The final sequence is another huge set piece involving a subway car which I found to be a nice capper for the film.

I do find it interesting though that shit like “Hostel” (which promised more than it could deliver) gets praised and yet a film like “Final Destination 3” (which promises nothing) gets lambasted. Oh, well. I guess Glen Morgan and James Wong aren’t peddling their ass all over Hollywood like a certain Eli Roth seems to be doing.

Bottom Line:
Definitely not a “great” horror movie but it’s solid, mindless fare … especially if you in the mood to watch teens die (and die messy).

Tobe Hooper’s remake of “The Toolbox Murders” is yet another one of those remakes that has nothing really to do with the original film other than the killer has a fettish for power tools.

Director Tobe Hooper’s gory “retooling” of the late ’70s chiller centers on a young couple (Angela Bettis and Brent Roam) who move into an old run-down L.A. apartment complex, only to find out that the structure is under the influence of an evil supernatural force that uses all manner of home improvement equipment to commit a grisly massacre.

I liked this movie a lot. It’s not the greatest horror movie ever made, but it far surpasses what is being churned out by the Hollywood cookie cutter. “Toolbox Murders” delivers all the gritty chills and violence that movies like “Hostel” and “Saw” promise and then never deliver. Hooper uses a nice creepy locale (the now demolished Ambassador Hotel) and a lot of visual misdirection for some really cheap thrills. Also on tap, are quite a few messy deaths involving the aforementioned power tools. The cast is very solid, led by a really solid performance by Angela Bettis. Sheri Moon even pops up in a nice bit part and is actually quite good (not so over-the-top like her performances in Rob Zombie’s two films). My major complaint would be the “supernatural” aspect of the film. I can get behind that the Lusman Arms was built with Satanism and evil in mind. It would have been more interesting if the “supernatural” aspects had been more misdirection rather than the final explanation for the killer and his wicked ways. ‘Cause I don’t like that you never find out just why a supernatural being would have a power tool fettish. That makes it kinda silly … until he saws the top of someone’s head off with a hand-held circular saw. Now that, I like!

Bottom Line:
Somewhat flawed but definately worth checking out.